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Olympics
Posted by: Lindsay on August 26, 2004 @ 8:20 pm
One American says to another, " Why isn’t there lots of Canadians in the Olympics this year?
The second American Replied, "Because they couldn’t pass the drug test." |
Add your own comment
| From: |
stoopid on August 27, 2004 @ 4:39 pm |
| Comment: |
thats not true candians aren’t in the olympics because they couldn’t put up the money! |
| From: |
Canadienne on August 28, 2004 @ 12:57 am |
| Comment: |
FERK YOU AMERICAN DUDE!!!!!!!!!! |
| From: |
sexay on August 28, 2004 @ 2:55 am |
| Comment: |
hehehehe i was also wondering ... stupid canadians!!!!!
Go U.S GOOOOO GOOOOOOO |
| From: |
the weird canadian on August 28, 2004 @ 3:29 pm |
| Comment: |
No you didn’t I do not think you stoupod ass americans should diid my country! atleast canadians don’t get it on with our dads!! |
| From: |
MOSES the CANADIAN on August 29, 2004 @ 5:05 am |
| Comment: |
Damn i love Marijuana good joke(5) just wait till the winter olympics....and its not cause they couldnt put up money retard its actually because...they had more strict ...quilifying standards this year someone decided that fewer more "skilled" olympians meant more medals.....and damn that carly pattersons a fox...even if she is an american.... |
| From: |
covetousjew on September 1, 2004 @ 1:15 am |
| Comment: |
FUCK CANADA ITS NOT EVEN A REAL COUNTRY ANYWAY AND FUCK THAT BITCH ANN MURRY TOO!!! |
| From: |
covetousjew on September 1, 2004 @ 1:56 am |
| Comment: |
FUCK CANADA ITS NOT EVEN A REAL COUNTRY ANYWAY AND FUCK THAT BITCH ANN MURRY TOO!!! |
| From: |
fabien de France on September 9, 2004 @ 3:21 pm |
| Comment: |
Because they couldn’t the drug test ! . Et c’est un Américain qui ose dire ça . Les Américain sont des tricheurs et des menteurs ! . You don’t understand my words . Si tu était allé à l’école , tu comprendrais . You are stupid baby.
I kiss your ass with love . :O) |
| From: |
Lauren on September 10, 2004 @ 8:32 pm |
| Comment: |
That was the stupidest joke ever. YOU SUCK! |
| From: |
bballfloater394 on September 17, 2004 @ 7:22 pm |
| Comment: |
HAHAHA goooood joke... CANADA SUCKS..... you could count how many people live there on one hand.... we should take a few missles and blow the shit outta them for target practice!! |
| From: |
aCHaia on September 20, 2004 @ 11:19 pm |
| Comment: |
LMFAO oH MaN DaTs a FuNNy JoKe CuZZZ
|
| From: |
french chick on September 29, 2004 @ 5:43 pm |
| Comment: |
at least we didnt get bombed.
|
| From: |
fabien de france on September 29, 2004 @ 6:15 pm |
| Comment: |
Hellooooo ! :O) |
| From: |
Canadian Girl on October 5, 2004 @ 9:30 pm |
| Comment: |
Ah c’est ca Fabien! Vive le Canada! |
| From: |
canadian babii on October 11, 2004 @ 9:03 am |
| Comment: |
canada rox your fuckin world and like fabien said the americains are a bunch of lyers and cheaters and it had to be an american who made up that joke for sure!!!
CANADA IS THE BEST COUNTRY IN DA WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
luv, tanya :o) |
| From: |
canadian babii on October 11, 2004 @ 9:04 am |
| Comment: |
canada rox your fuckin world and like fabien said the americains are a bunch of lyers and cheaters and it had to be an american who made up that joke for sure!!!
CANADA IS THE BEST COUNTRY IN DA WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
luv, tanya :o) |
| From: |
Canadian Chica on October 11, 2004 @ 2:37 pm |
| Comment: |
I agree entirely with Tanya’s last comment. Canada certainly is the best country.
:) |
| From: |
canadienne! on October 12, 2004 @ 6:12 pm |
| Comment: |
Canada est la plus belle pays au monde! tu est stupide et ridicule si tu te dit des plaiserie apprepos du Canada! je suis chanseuse que je sois dans canada! tous les amériqiens son jaloux! j’aime canada et je vais toujours l’aimer. Donc si tu n’aime pas dit rien de volgere apprepos de nous! les ameriquens pense que il sont plus bon que nous mais non tu est des snobs. j’aimerais que le pays aurais du pays. mais sa va j’aimait arriver si tu n’arrete pas a dire ces chose maintenant. i cant speal english very well so you people may not understand french cause U.S is not bilingual! i am lucky to no different languages. its called SCHOOL! you people probably only can speak 1 language so ha ha ha ha ha Aurevoir. |
| From: |
no on October 13, 2004 @ 8:54 am |
| Comment: |
Look canada you really are shooting yourselves in the foot here seeing as 9 out of 10 of the canadian comments have notorious misspellings, unbelievably lame come backs, and some arent even typed in english...ON AN ENGLISH WEB SITE. |
| From: |
WHATTHEHELL on October 17, 2004 @ 5:52 pm |
| Comment: |
Hey, Canadienne how the hell did you spell Canadian wrong? |
| From: |
Americana on October 17, 2004 @ 5:56 pm |
| Comment: |
Canadians can’t spell can they? Why do Canadian women have beards? because you can’t tell if it’s a man or a women! |
| From: |
DENNIS on October 17, 2004 @ 9:07 pm |
| Comment: |
CANADA HAS NO MUNCIPAL SYSTEM. THEY DUMP THEIR OWN FILTHY HUMAN WASTER AND NUMEROUS OTHER WASTES INTO THEIR DRINKING WATER SYSTEMS. ALSO, BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO CLEANLINESS, DECENCY, INTELLIGENCE, OR RESPECT AND THEY ARE GREEDY THEY HAVE FOREIGN NATIONS PAY THEM SMALL AMOUNTS OF MONEY TO DUMP THEIR WASTES INTO CANDADIAN SUPPLY SYSTEMS. THIS IS ONLY IN KEEPING WITH THE OVERALL REPULSIVENESS OF CANADA. IT IS A FACT THAT CANADA SINGULARLY AS A NATION HAS GIVEN THE WORLD MORE KINDS OF DISEASE, SEVERAL DEADLY ONES, THAN ANY OTHER 4 NATIONS PUT TOGETHER. CANADA IS A DISGRACE IN EVERY WAY AND IS CAUSING THE WORLD GREAT HARM IN SO MANY WAYS. IF ONLY THERE WAS A WAY TO OBLITERATE THE NASTY DISEASED SCAB KNOWN AS CANADA. |
| From: |
DENNIS on October 17, 2004 @ 9:11 pm |
| Comment: |
CANADA IS THE MOST PATHETIC NATION EVER. THEY SHOULD BE GOVERNED BY GREAT BRITAIN AND AUSTRALIA. THANK THE DEAR LORD THAT CANADA IS A WEAK AND USELESS NATION. IF THEY HAD ANY SAY OR INFLUENCE WHATSOEVER, THE WELL BEING OF THIS PLANET WOULD INDEED BE IN SERIOUS JEOPARDY. STUPIDITY, UGLINESS, OBESITY, LYING, CHEATING, VANDALISM, COWARDICE, IGNORANCE, RACISM, HATE, LUST, WEAKNESS, AND RANCID BODY ODOR IS A COMMON TRAIT AMONG MOST CANADIANS. FURTHERMORE, THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS AN EVEN SLIGHTY ATTRACTIVE CANADIEN FEMALE. ALL FEMALES IN CANADA ARE UGLY, FAT, HAIRY, SMELLY, AND ALL OUT REPULSIVE. THE LITTLE GIRLS IN CANADA RESEMBLE RETARDED, OVERWEIGHT BABBOONS THAT ARE REPULSIVELY DISGUSTING AND HAVE SICK LITTLE MINDS.
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| From: |
JJ the American on October 20, 2004 @ 10:17 pm |
| Comment: |
Dude, don’t be dissing on Canada! I’m American and damn proud to be one. But I also think Canada rocks and I hope to visit Montreal one day. They’re our brothers man, dont you be dissin them. Canada is cool and so is America. Stop flippin out and get over it. BTW, there is a place in America that isn’t fat and stupid. Down here, see, they’re called New York and Texas. Learn it, y’all.
P.S. I can so read what you’re sayin man. Just cuz I’m American don’t mean I can’t understand it. Our country has freedom of speech so we’re not required to learn anything like that till high school. Which is where I plan on learning french. Quebec rocks.
P.P.S. GO AMERICA AND CANADA!
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| From: |
alexzandrea on October 21, 2004 @ 7:26 pm |
| Comment: |
yo my fams canadian and i dont think thats to funny .i mean ha ha geek
|
| From: |
Moses on October 21, 2004 @ 10:56 pm |
| Comment: |
first of all Canadienne in french for Canadian...fuck notice what language he or she was typing in?? you just proved how ignorant yourself and many americans really are and dennis stop writing shit no ones bothering to read that anyways. and whoever wrote "Why do Canadian women have beards? because you can’t tell if it’s a man or a women!: dude that doesnt even make sense. |
| From: |
Moses on October 21, 2004 @ 10:59 pm |
| Comment: |
.........hmmm this joke wasnt even offensive surprising why anyone would make a big deal over it anyways. |
| From: |
jnicks on October 24, 2004 @ 5:35 pm |
| Comment: |
Canada is a piss poor excuse for a country! I’ve seen trailor parks with more class than the whole country of Canada. You are all a bunch of pussies....no wonder alot of you speak french b/c the french are pussies! And for all of you who say to bomb America, I say fuck off because you Canadians have no balls to do anything. You are all a bunch of peace loving hippies. Fucking with an American will be the last mistake you ever make. Guaranteed! |
| From: |
jnicks on October 24, 2004 @ 5:43 pm |
| Comment: |
One more thing: LEARN HOW TO SPELL YOU IGNORANT CANADIANS! Do you guys have dictionaries or spell checker up there? This is an ENGLISH site, therefore write in ENGLISH or are you afraid to because you are a retard?
CANADA IS THE PART OF THE UNITED STATES THAT NO ONE WANTED! |
| From: |
ME!? on November 4, 2004 @ 1:00 am |
| Comment: |
omg dont ever talk about canada again like that u fucking losers CANADA ROX!! |
| From: |
Jazz on November 5, 2004 @ 4:00 am |
| Comment: |
Canada sux, America is the only one with enough balls to fight terrorist. Once Canada gets conquered by the fundamentalists, You will all suck our dick. |
| From: |
2 awesome contries on November 7, 2004 @ 5:10 pm |
| Comment: |
Allow me to educate you a little about canada. Canada is the the second largest nation in the world, has not one but two official languages and although is not a perfect country like any other, it has many benefits like free healthcare. SOme of you are dissing canada because you think you are much more superior but really we are all the same. I have been to the states and i have lived in canada and i can truly say that the countries are not really that much different. We both share the same languages, we have similar cultures, and if you ever crossed the border you wouldn’t even tell the difference between the two countries because. Althought Canada is a lot cleaner (no offence). I love both Canada and America and they are both great countries to live in you just gotta make the best of what they are and instead of trying to find ways why your country is better why don’t you stop wasting your time on that and find ways how too make you country a more pleasant place to live in!!
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| From: |
Canada Drinking Team on November 22, 2004 @ 10:05 pm |
| Comment: |
Dear Lord.... I have met some really great Americans....None of them seem to visit this site though. Seriously, if you hate Canada so much, why are you on a website devoted to CANADA. Hmmm...makes me wonder about the intelligence of some of our "neighbors". If your still wondering about our greatness, here’s some facts for you..
Baseball, Lacrosse, Hockey, and Basketball are ALL Canadian.
In the war of 1812, started by America, Canadians pushed
the Americans back...past their ’White House’. Then we burned it...and most of Washington, under the command of William Lyon McKenzie who was insane and hammered all the time. We got bored because they ran away, so we came home and partied...Go figure..
We have the largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war to anyone, anywhere......
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| From: |
Canada Drinking Team on November 22, 2004 @ 10:08 pm |
| Comment: |
CONTINUED (because we are THAT great)
The only person who was arrested in our civil war was an American mercenary, who slept in and missed the whole thing... but showed up just in time to get caught.
The Hudsons Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earth’s surface and is still around as the worlds oldest company.
We don’t marry our kin-folk.
We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, zippers, insulin, penicillin, zambonis, the telephone and short wave radios.
A Canadian invented Superman.
The handles on our beer cases are big enough to fit your hands with mitts on. OOOoohhhhh Canada!!
Oh yeah... and our elections only take one day.
Cheers!
|
| From: |
Candian in America on November 26, 2004 @ 1:34 pm |
| Comment: |
I’m proud to be Canadian! All you people who dis Canada have probably never been there. I can’t tell the difference between the U.S and Canada, really. It’s like they were created off of the same base or something. Amyways, you know what I mean. We all have McDonald’s and Pizza Hut and elections, a democracy, an American/Canadian accent, so it’s like your dissing a copy of yourselves. Plus, that was only a joke. People make millions of American and Canadian jokes, get over it. They are only places to live. |
| From: |
DENNIS on December 5, 2004 @ 6:56 pm |
| Comment: |
THE GOOD DEAR LORD WILL MAKE U BURN IN HELL FOR STEALING MY HEART, DICKSHITHEADS
GO WIPE THE POOPY OFF OF GRANNY AND GRAMPS, ASSHOLES
I AM CANADIAN U FUCKING RETARDS, ARE U FUCKING RETARDED? I AM CANADIAN!!!!!!!! I WAS BORN AND RAISED IN THE GREAT LAND OF CANADA! I RESIDE IN CANADA, ASSHOLES!!! I AM PRO-CANADIAN AND I LOVE CANADA!!! YOU WILL SURELY PERISH FOR YOUR EVILS!!!! |
| From: |
THE DOCTOR on December 6, 2004 @ 11:43 pm |
| Comment: |
You ARE a Canadian DENNIS?? In that case I suggest you up your medication.
Especially with words like...."good dear lord?"....."burn in hell?"...... "stealing my
heart?"......"perish for your evils??" What are you talking about? Does anyone know
what the hell he’s talking about?? And, did you REALLY use the word
"POOPY???"......POOPY DENNIS?? How can you call anyone retarded when you use
the word POOPY??? Man.....you’r suffering from the worst case of sexual frustration I’v
ever come across. My guess is that you have cut your right hand and are unable to
masturbate! The Doctor recommends a prescription of: blow it out your ass, three times a
day.....better make that five, and a kevlar straight jacket (highly recommended), and try
to stop talking shit by not taking this so seriously you sad anal bastard (your on a joke
web site man....that goes for all of you). Finally, take a big fucking chill pill (the blue one)
and call me in a week.
|
| From: |
DENNIS on December 8, 2004 @ 8:46 pm |
| Comment: |
HOW DARE YOU! I AM A REAL DOCTOR YOU FUCKED UP FOOL! I ATTENDED HARVARD AND THEN THE PRESTIGIOUS LA CHECHICHAN DAL VALICHE` UNIVERSITY IN CANADA FOR MY MASTER’S AND PH.D. I’LL LET YOU GUESS IN WHICH WONDROUS PROVINCE IT LIES. WHERE ARE YOU FROM? HMMM? SEXUAL FRUSTATION INDEED I HAVE NOT DEAR SIR! I SPOIL A VIRGIN EVERY NIGHT, GOOD DEAR SIR! AFTER I TRASH HER VIRGINITY I LAUGH AT HER AND MOCK HER BECAUSE I SPOILED HER FOR NOTHING AND SHE LOST HER PRECIOUS VIRGINITY FOR NOTHING!!! SHE WASTED HER VIRGINITY!!! FOOL! I THEN GO POOPY ON HER AND THROW DAT BITCH OUT WIT NO A DEM CLOTHES ON. DEM’S JAWN’S EZ HOT YO. AND SO YOU CAN SEE DEAR SIR, THAT IN FACT I HAVE NO SEXUAL FRUSTRATION! FOOL! I IN FACT SPOILED YOUR TWO SISTERS AND YOUR BIG BROTHER AND YOUR DEAR AUNT SARAH! FOOL! DARE YOU SAY ANYTHING MORE SIR! |
| From: |
down w/ america on December 28, 2004 @ 11:52 am |
| Comment: |
Look Canada rocks. America is filled w/ a bunch of morons and as a result is being led by a bunch of morons. when i graduate from high school im going to canada cause its the best country in the world(i know most americans are stupid but im not one of them so plz welcome me w/ open arms in about 4 yrs.) so dont go around insulting it GO CANADA GO AMERICA SUX |
| From: |
CanadaRules on December 29, 2004 @ 7:19 am |
| Comment: |
Well my dear friend,we all know Americans are just Canadian wannabe’s.But to be a Canadian you must have been born here in our beatufile land::sings OH,CANADA: |
| From: |
CanadaRules on December 29, 2004 @ 7:22 am |
| Comment: |
Dennis,you are insane?Right?Well,doctor Rules gonna up your medication and everythings gonna be allright...and as for you attending Harvard...big deal,everyone knows Waterloo rules,Harvard sucks ass major time |
| From: |
BC HOCKEY PLAYER on January 4, 2005 @ 1:46 pm |
| Comment: |
I’m Canadian Eh! I lost my mukluks you know eh. Maybe for Christmas you Americans can get me a new pair o’ snowshoes. I’d like that eh. Eh, USA sucks eh.
|
| From: |
canadian hockey play on January 5, 2005 @ 8:33 pm |
| Comment: |
who gives a shit about the summer olympics, look at the winter ones bitches |
| From: |
BACK to the JOKE on January 19, 2005 @ 5:36 am |
| Comment: |
First of all, it isn’t a "joke" as there is no surprise inherent in it. I am Canadian, and I am THRILLED that Canada underfunds its Olympic athletes. I couldn’t care less how many medals we bring home, as long as we participate joyfully. I’d much rather see the money spent on our strong social and medical programmes.
God has blessed us with an attitude of cheerful good sportsmanship and WAY too much common sense to sit around masturbating about Olympic medals. Yet ANOTHER reason I am proud to be Canadian. |
| From: |
JO Canadian on January 20, 2005 @ 12:07 pm |
| Comment: |
What is the coloUr of the sky in your little world Dezz? YOUR opinion of Canadians are losers. Nice to know, I’m glad the rest of the ENTIRE world has the same opinion of you and your ilk. At least 49% of americans have a brain on their shoulders. You have severe tunnel vision man...the only cure I can reccomend for you is immediate sterilization. The U.S. doesn’t need your genes. |
| From: |
JO Canadian on January 25, 2005 @ 12:55 pm |
| Comment: |
Well ok, I did go too far with the sterilization thing...bad day at work and all (Call centres do that to you) Apparently our gov’t had sterilized "losers" back in the 50’s and before that, but we’re still reeling from the ensuing lawsuits. We at least got to curb the loser breeding for a few decades. I can’t speak for the new generation though, they’re fucking rabbits and they’re not too bright either. |
| From: |
Canada kicks ass! on January 27, 2005 @ 12:18 pm |
| Comment: |
That was the dumbest Canadian Insult joke I have ever heard.It is real clear that Americans can’t be funny.Along with all the other thing’s they can’t do.Canada is the best god dam country there is America is below us on the map and below us in everything else.. |
| From: |
SmartCanadianChick on March 21, 2005 @ 4:35 am |
| Comment: |
What feasible purpose does it have to slander each other over a dumb joke? While all this ‘Canadians vs. Americans’ (or Americans vs. Canadians. Whatever was you want to look at it) is all really cute (aww…) it serves no intelligent rationale. Though on a side note: I think it neither fair nor congruous to say that all Canadians are cacographic, as you can see my own writing skills are reasonably good. I wouldn’t say all Americans are fat, McDonald eating, ignorant dimwits. Generalizations are for the small minded who don’t have enough intellectual aptitude to educate themselves. |
| From: |
CanadaHater on Marc, on March 27, 2005 @ 12:57 am |
| Comment: |
Canada is just one big bowl full of dumb fucking canucks! |
| From: |
CanadaHater on March 27, 2005 @ 12:59 am |
| Comment: |
Canada sucks at hockey.
10 of the last 12 games between American and Canadian teams have been won by Americans!!!!!!!! Suck it Canada!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| From: |
MICHEAL LIBRANDE on March 29, 2005 @ 2:29 pm |
| Comment: |
I’M JASON’S BROTHER, AKA- D-E-N-N-I-S
YOU ASSHOLES!! I AM CANADIAN FOOLS!!!!
MY BROTHER PLAYS WITH ME IF GRANNY TURNS HIM DOWN!!, JUST LET HIM HAVE HIS WAY GRANNY, U OLD BITCH, JASON- LEAVE ME ALONE AND STAY WITH GRANNY N’ GRAMPS, AND LEAVE ME WITH GREAT AUNT SUE!!! AND NO YOU CAN’T EAT MY POOPIES TONIGHT, BUT I’LL LET YOU TASTE MY BUTTHOLE FOR TEN MINUTES BECAUSE I DO LIKE THAT!!!! CANADA IS THE BEST COUNTRY EVER, MY DEAR JIMMIES! |
| From: |
DENNIS on March 29, 2005 @ 5:20 pm |
| Comment: |
HERRRRRRE’S DENNIS!!!
NOW LISTEN UP U FUCKIN AMERICAN PUNKS!
MY REAL NAME IS Micheal Librande. I LIVE IN Ottawa. U POOPY TERD LOSERS!!!
YOU EAT POOPIES. GO WIPE THE POOPIES OFF GRANNY N GRAMPS, ASSHOLES!!!
GO TAKE A SPONGEBATH WITH GREAT AUNT SUE AND OLD MR. JOHNSON!!
YOU HAVE TYPE 2 FECES ( THE WORST KIND, YOU FOOLS!!) (BTW- THERE’S 5 TYPES OF FECES U DUMBASSESS!!!) OH KOOM BAI AH!!!! I LOVE OLD MR. JOHNSON!! AS A LITTLE BOY I WORKED FOR HIM. I HAD MY FIRST INTIMATE ACT WITH HIM WHEN I WAS 13, hehehehe, IN ANY EVENT U.S.A. SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GO CANADA!!!!!!!!!!! YAY FOR WONDERFUL CANUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DO ENJOY HOCKEY DEAR FRIENDS!!!!!!!!!!!! OH HOW I DO LOVE MY JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DR. PHIL IS MY GOOD DEAR FRIEND!!!!!!!! AMERICANS ARE ALL FAT AND STUPID AND THEY CAN’T EVEN LOCATE TURKMENISTAN ON A MAP!!!!!! IT’S IN SOUTHEAST ASIA, YOU DUMB FUCKS!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHA FOOLS, I WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| From: |
CanadaHater on March 30, 2005 @ 10:01 pm |
| Comment: |
What do no more Canadians have the balls for a come back!!!!!!!!!
America Rules!!!!!
WE ARE FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| From: |
CanadaHater on March 30, 2005 @ 10:14 pm |
| Comment: |
Everyone who loves America should insult Canada now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Because I’m gone
Canada is so ugly!!!!! At least we got some chicks in America!!!!
See Ya for good!!!!!!!!! |
| From: |
u suk on May 3, 2005 @ 6:37 pm |
| Comment: |
u ass monkey canadas rule!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| From: |
¿ on May 12, 2005 @ 8:35 am |
| Comment: |
Notice how the topic you are reading is Canadian "JOKES". Why would you get offended by a joke..? |
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