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international diplomacy
Posted by: loopy on February 8, 2005 @ 1:22 am
all of the world’s governments, except for one, got together to decide all of the important matters in the world.
which country wasn’t there?
canada because when you’re that fucking useless, you’re better off staying the fuck home.
(we would also have accepted as an answer:
canada because nobody gave a fuck whether they were there or not;
canada because everyone forgot it existed;
canada because they all figured if america was already there, why bother inviting its weak, redheaded, crippled bastard of a stepchild?)
NOW THAT, MY NEIGHBORS TO THE NORTH, IS A CANADIAN JOKE. |
Add your own comment
| From: |
Gunther USA on February 9, 2005 @ 7:51 pm |
| Comment: |
Why don’t you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance? |
| From: |
JO Canadian on February 10, 2005 @ 9:34 am |
| Comment: |
Obviously we have a Scholar here. |
| From: |
some dude from nyc on February 10, 2005 @ 10:28 pm |
| Comment: |
so, bashing the states is okay but doing it to canada ia taboo, eh? gotcha. |
| From: |
loopy on February 10, 2005 @ 10:52 pm |
| Comment: |
so, gunther, you’re saying i’m not ignorant enough? damn! and i was trying ever so hard to be a buffoon. |
| From: |
JO Canadian on February 11, 2005 @ 9:37 am |
| Comment: |
lol, it seems we’re all in this to bash each other. BREAK OUT THE BABY SEAL CLUBS. :-D |
| From: |
Gunther USA on February 11, 2005 @ 6:17 pm |
| Comment: |
What I’m saying, loopy, is that a really good joke can be enjoyed for its wit humor, whether you’re on the upside or the downside of it.. From your example of a joke, you are too ignorant to understand that concept. |
| From: |
loopy on February 11, 2005 @ 10:33 pm |
| Comment: |
okay, sir gunther, how’s this one:
a newfie walks into a bar with a pile of shit in his hands and says, "hey, look what i almost stepped in!". |
| From: |
one boob on February 14, 2005 @ 5:53 pm |
| Comment: |
Ya, that one was good! I agree with the guy from nyc. Canadians are extremely jealous of americans. Whenever, americans make fun of us we pout and cal them names and accuse them of arrogance. Then we decide it is justified to make fun of them and talk about how the very country that keeps us from falling is filled with jerks who should all die. Maybe we should think before we speak - something we don’t do too often.
Whichever side you’re from - whether it’s american or canadian jokes aren’t very funny when they are just made in spite because you’re angry. |
| From: |
SirPsycho on February 17, 2005 @ 3:32 pm |
| Comment: |
One boob:
I think you summarized the key EVERYONE in the world needs to learn about humor. There is a fine line between targeted humor and bigotry. If a joke is intended to be fun, then its all good. When its intended purpose is only to be insulting or mean... the humor stops.
If only everyone could understand that. |
| From: |
some dude from nyc on February 18, 2005 @ 2:20 am |
| Comment: |
thanx, mr. boob.
and sir psycho, my point was: if you look at this "canadian" joke site, you’ll see that 80% of the jokes bash america in some way. i posted the above "joke" (it was me) to make a point. canadian jokes should be about canada. leave the american bashing out of it or yes, we do tend to get pissy. |
| From: |
JO Canadian on February 19, 2005 @ 3:53 pm |
| Comment: |
I guess it’s the fact when you get some hotheaded Canadians wanting to say something about the jokes, and can’t place it anywhere else...Why isn’t there an American jokes category?
Some dude will see alot less american bashing jokes on this site if we had that option....I guess they can be placed in the BUSH jokes section, because I guess any american worth joking about voted for bush anyways. |
| From: |
///////////////// on February 23, 2005 @ 8:04 am |
| Comment: |
Where can you find American Jokes? Not here, but try:
http://forum.gazeta.pl/forum/72,2.html?f=384&w=20885243&a=20885243
and have a good fun out of Americans ;o) |
| From: |
lick it on February 24, 2005 @ 10:43 am |
| Comment: |
Canada can lick my taint... |
| From: |
some dude from nyc on March 4, 2005 @ 1:41 am |
| Comment: |
well, JO, your point might have some validity...until, for example, you look at the "naming of canada" joke. that’s a canadian joke, but three comments in, someone says "oh yeah? well at least canada is a place of love and understanding. not like america!!!" (or something like that). y’all should get yer shit straight and at least admit there’s an issue that no canadians are willing to address: many of you are jealous of the states. |
| From: |
xerox on March 7, 2005 @ 5:15 pm |
| Comment: |
you mentioned ’naming of canada’ joke?
Do you know one about naming of the USA?
It’s really simple (so every dumb american will hopefuly understand it), it’s just a short, simplified form of You Stupid Americans ;o) |
| From: |
some dude from nyc on March 9, 2005 @ 10:17 am |
| Comment: |
hey xerox...by the way is that an american company you’ve named yourself after? good job, my little fruitcake. um, yeah, and WE’RE dumb. |
| From: |
xerox on March 11, 2005 @ 8:04 am |
| Comment: |
hejy some dude from nyc - I don’t suppose you’d ever know from where this name came from??? No you’re american - it’s impossible... |
| From: |
Carvito on March 11, 2005 @ 11:15 am |
| Comment: |
Xerox. who the hell gets up at 8:04 2 go on the internet? Get a life, learn 2 spell, & burn in hell with the rest of your buddies buried in my backyard |
| From: |
some dude from nyc on March 12, 2005 @ 10:23 am |
| Comment: |
xerox: from the states.
canadian girl: y’all is usually used in the southern part of the states and i picked it up living in dallas. every joke on this site is about america so yes, i do think y’all have an issue with us. and everyone in canada sounds the same, huh? i’m not so sure about that (newfies and people from quebec sound, um, a bit different, don’t they?) but being proud of everyone sounding the same is kinda lame, don’t you think? |
| From: |
xerox on March 14, 2005 @ 6:28 pm |
| Comment: |
Well Carvito - as a good american you cannot understand how it is possible that I write at this hour? As a good american you think that there’s only average american time and nothing else...
check what do they write about american intelligence - maybe it’ll help, though I doubt it. |
| From: |
some dude from nyc on March 14, 2005 @ 10:23 pm |
| Comment: |
canada is boring.
canada is lame
canada’s full of pussies
who can’t handle lack of fame
no one knows who you are
or even where you’re at
and no one cares about canada
what y’all think ’bout that? |
| From: |
A Canuck Dudette on March 16, 2005 @ 3:36 pm |
| Comment: |
Hey Dude From NYC:
Q: What’s the difference between an American and a Canadian?
A: Not much....except that a Canadian knows they are part of an entire world....an American thinks they should own it!
Q: Why doesn’t Bush like Canada?
A: Someone showed him a map and he found out that Canada was "above" him!
Canada may be lesser known than the U.S., but I’ll bet that it has less nukes aimed at it’s ass!
If FAME means having to worry about being attacked, then I think Canada can handle it’s "lack of fame" quite nicely!
|
| From: |
some dude from nyc on March 17, 2005 @ 10:46 pm |
| Comment: |
i do believe the big difference between americans and canadians is that we know who we are. we don’t have to start a website for CANADA jokes just to rip on americans. we can laugh at ourselves. you can’t. i live in japan. if you ask any canadian why they have a maple leaf on their bag, they ALWAYS say "so no one mistakes me for an american". it’s not national pride, it’s displaced aggression because y’all are jealous. jealous. jealous. jealous (come on, say it with me!) jealouesealousjealous
oh, and 50,000,000 people didn’t vote for bush. me being one of them. so you can save your bush rips for someone who gives a fuck. |
| From: |
Asia on March 26, 2005 @ 6:21 am |
| Comment: |
I completly agree with you some dude from nyc - they are boring, they are weak and so jealous of US, and apart of this I can tell you (living in Canda for 18 years long) that they are extremly agressive with anyone better then (if they happen to live in Canada).
I am model and I almost can’t walk on the streets for 1 hour without I am not agressed by someone here . Hey this sounds pretty like a joke, doesn’t it lol? But in fact it’s my every day reality here.
And stop this bullshit about canada beeing a peaceful country lol - this is fucking childlish. like if a governement would be "more peaceful" that any other - he just want to maintain its own interests, and the Canadian one needs immigrants precisely and invented laws to keep everyone one here under control , to not create problems between all the different races
|
| From: |
Asia on March 26, 2005 @ 6:24 am |
| Comment: |
Apart of this canadians are not any "gentle" or nice people lol - they are just a bunch of easy peasy weak hypocrtites.
1 - they are not any gentle or nice - they are just undiscrimniating (simply cause they are unperceptive), cheap and easy peasy
2 - Yes they are so nice with foreign people when they travel abroad (exept in US) - but not because they love so much foreign people (exept for the US) - but because cause they have an inferority complex lol.
they will not just yield and become arrogant at french or italians as they use to be in them country - they just feel so small all of the sudden. And they are right to feel so lol. Look at them - they doesn’t have any culture, any charm, fashion sense (by the way fahsion is an art in fact;), individuality , neither brain (no not many here think by themselves)
|
| From: |
Asia on March 26, 2005 @ 6:25 am |
| Comment: |
They just look like so pitfull so yes they are better to hide themselves, cause in fact they don’t have much to offer.And they know it preciely:)
But hey - watch out the big arogance when coming back to Canada - the attitude change tottaly:) And watch out if you are better them them and live in them territory - they will agress (yeah agress you lol) you and piss you out - no they will not be any more sympatetic:))) |
| From: |
Asia on March 26, 2005 @ 6:25 am |
| Comment: |
Exactly the same story as with US - they hate you so much cause you are number 1 and happen to be THEM NEIGHBORS, wich precisely make them feel so small
So stop this fucking bullshit about your country beeing a peaceful quiet place - you re just a buch of fucking agressive unsilfull and jealous hypocrites, too affraid to show them real face to the world and your fucking true intentions.
Try to be superior instead of beeing jealous and agressive because others are better then you - and you a bunch of uneducated, unattractive, uninteresting morons who are just too lazy to move them butt to do something with them life. |
| From: |
MICHEAL LIBRANDE on March 29, 2005 @ 2:22 pm |
| Comment: |
I’M JASON’S BROTHER, AKA- D-E-N-N-I-S
YOU ASSHOLES!! I AM CANADIAN FOOLS!!!!
MY BROTHER PLAYS WITH ME IF GRANNY TURNS HIM DOWN!!, JUST LET HIM HAVE HIS WAY GRANNY, U OLD BITCH, JASON- LEAVE ME ALONE AND STAY WITH GRANNY N’ GRAMPS, AND LEAVE ME WITH GREAT AUNT SUE!!! AND NO YOU CAN’T EAT MY POOPIES TONIGHT, BUT I’LL LET YOU TASTE MY BUTTHOLE FOR TEN MINUTES BECAUSE I DO LIKE THAT!!!! CANADA IS THE BEST COUNTRY EVER, MY DEAR JIMMIES! |
| From: |
CrankyCanuck on April 12, 2005 @ 4:29 pm |
| Comment: |
This is really pretty silly if you ask me. I am Canadian and although I love my country (and am not jealous) I think somethimes this Anti-American ranting goes too far. I do not say this because I care about Americans either way, but because American bashing doesn’t makes us any better than they. It’s like arguing with an immature idiot, if you ask me, you are simply choosing to stoop to their level. I know a lot of Canadians who love to bitch about Americans, and what is the end result?? NOTHING! So get over it already, move on with your life, get a hobby, etc. Thank you for your time, now go and do the right thing... |
| From: |
spanky on April 27, 2005 @ 1:04 am |
| Comment: |
loopy, you realize canada is rated higher than the USA as far as the best places to live go ? eat my canadian ass |
| From: |
American on April 29, 2005 @ 7:17 pm |
| Comment: |
Canada is actually renked the best place to live in the World. I’m an American, but I thought that I’d let you know that they are the Leader! America was second! |
| From: |
Jamal on May 10, 2005 @ 8:48 am |
| Comment: |
People, We are suppose to be allies, stop ruining it by lame jokes that three year olds can come up with... |
| From: |
Jamal on May 11, 2005 @ 11:53 am |
| Comment: |
Another thing I wanted to point out (I just read all the stupid coments) is that everyone else in the world seems to get along with Canada just fine, so just because you’re not means that it’s our fault.
Stop sucking in whatever pride you have, Canada is a nice place. Oh yeah, with it’s low crime rate and it’s free health care, Canada surely has lots of things to be jealous about.
I traveled down to the US once for camp, I was camping in the same tent as some americans and they were making fun of us soooo much that it drove me crazy. Suddenly, the pricks made fun of French acadians, he later regretted it when I kicked the crap out of him.
Canadians aren’t weak or afraid, so don’t be bullshiting about stuff you don’t understand. |
| From: |
we on May 19, 2005 @ 4:42 am |
| Comment: |
should smoke a number. lol. |
| From: |
pissed off canadian on May 21, 2005 @ 7:53 pm |
| Comment: |
Hey loopy...hop a dog sled straight to hell. Canada is awesome and we’re not as insignifigant as you think. You wouldnt have hockey, lacross, basketball, zippers, etc.
a few american jokes and you’ve got your dander up and you’re cursing us up and down. now if you’ll excuse me i think i’ll go sit on the chesterfeild with a poutine and a real beer watch some hockey........eh |
| From: |
pissed off canadian on May 21, 2005 @ 8:06 pm |
| Comment: |
okay ..i wasnt finished.. when you think about this its all a load of bull. There are nice americans and mean canadians and people get shot in canada too so how about we put all the ignorant name calling infantile bullshit behind us. We’re not making our respective countries look any better by dissing the other one. So im gonna apologize for my previous comment (even though it made me laugh).
Sorry
From your Neighbour to the North |
| From: |
Jamal on May 25, 2005 @ 11:46 am |
| Comment: |
So the starting argument for this joke was that canadians can’t take jokes. That’s not excactly true, because this was not considered a joke, it was just a ignorant attack against the country. No humor what-so-ever. You want to see a joke, read a couple of mine and see what REAL humor is about. If it was a joke, then it would be different, but seenig how it’s not really a joke, then it clearly shows that being this ignorant blinds people from sensible facts.
Face it, Canada jokes about your country for reasons, and yours is from your own idea of what Canada is, from all your steriotypes. I know that americans know what happens out there, but some of them just don’t know what’s funny or stupid. |
| From: |
Jamal on May 25, 2005 @ 11:56 am |
| Comment: |
And I can tell that Asia most likely never even been to the country. The fact that you think that you’re better then everyone else is giving people bad vibes about you. People don’t respect others when they act all big, who know, you were most likely prancing down our streets acting like you own the place, which would explain bad reactions. I’ve been down to America, and no I’m not lying, I’ve been down there. It was horrible, like I already said, they labeled me as soon as I said I was canadian. They thought that I said "eh" all the time and prounced about "aboot" and they laughed at my "inferior" stance. . |
| From: |
Jamal on May 25, 2005 @ 11:59 am |
| Comment: |
Look at the world around you morons, Canada is one of the powers of the world. Bringing peace to countries that are ready for it, not forcing it on those who aren’t. My Prime Minister, who is caught up in all this scandle which would normaly destroy anyone, but he continued to lead my country in the right direction. Although Kerry isn’t that good, Bush is even worse. America is dependent on their media, which is the worse thing to do. American Media is the worse, CNN "News Americans Trust". That was their first mistake, they trusted them. Telling half stories and semi truths, most americans are living in deception. You guys think that the entire world is in your country, if everyone in there is happy, the entire world is happy. Bullshit, wake up! |
| From: |
¿ on May 25, 2005 @ 12:03 pm |
| Comment: |
If it was a joke that had any hilarity to it what so ever, perhaps people wouldn’t be pissed off. Canadians can take a joke just fine, if you look at the jokes posted here, most of the jokes that people argue about is when Canadians make jokes about the United States. Perhaps if the USA education system is so incredible as I have been told threw other posts, then perhaps they should teach you humor. If the world wasn’t devided up in different political countrys, you wouldn’t have Americans making fun of Canadians, because they would be just the same, not that they are any different now, other then the ignorance levels that most Americans apear to have when it comes to bashing Canada. |
| From: |
TRLCanuk on July 14, 2005 @ 1:10 pm |
| Comment: |
Well folkes, I’ve just reviewed the entirety of the exchanges over the last few months. I’m obviously Canadian, live in the US (8 years now). I have to say I’ve snickered at some of the jokes that were placed at the US expense. Goodness knowes I’ve listened to enough ’Canadian bashing’ jokes out of the mouths of Americans with a smile on my face. What I’d like to say here is I’ve not been impressed with pretty much 90% of the commentary I’ve read here today. It gives me chills to think I might actually know the majority of people leaving comments here. That goes for both sides of the border by the way -- equally. Obviously many of you are young so some allowances can be made. Boy! I can hear people getting their backs up from here. The point is, I really think that most of the jokes are in good fun. When push comes to shove, the cards are down ya da ya da ya da we’d all be there for each other. No questions asked. |
| From: |
JO Canadian on July 16, 2005 @ 12:41 pm |
| Comment: |
TO: Upside down ?
First of all it should classify as a joke, the formula for this one is askew at best.
TRLCanuk- You’ve nailed it, we are neighbours, we would stand up for each other when things get dirty. The comments here at amusing at best, at the worst.... |
| From: |
Canadian Guy on August 2, 2005 @ 12:08 pm |
| Comment: |
Ok I’m A Pround Canadian Because Our Country Just Doesn’t Go and Attack and kill people in Iraq Just Because The Stupidest and Most Hated World Leader Thought They had Wepons of Mass Destruction well have they found any..NO!!! and they never will So Why Don’t all you American LOSERS Tell Your idiotic President That he should stop using words like "MIsunderestimate" and running into people on his bike I’m Also glad I’m Canadian Cause Our Beer doesn’t taste like shitwater |
| From: |
slinky123 on September 6, 2005 @ 2:34 pm |
| Comment: |
You should all be ashamed of yourselves. Please grow up, get some self-respect, and move on. I am an American and very proud of it. We give more every year to humanitarian efforts than most countries combined! We are a big and wealthy, but generous country. No country’s government is going to be everything to everybody. You may bash us all you want, but who will you call to your rescue? You will call America when you have an emergency and guess what? We will be there! Hey, Canadian Guy - it’s called "anger management" get some! |
| From: |
CANADA RULES on October 14, 2005 @ 7:26 pm |
| Comment: |
U KNOW WHAT MADE CANADA STUPID!??!
its when all the fuckin AMerICaNS came to the beutiful country that were CANADA!
AND DON’T ASK URSELF WHY EVERY BODY HATES U...not only the canadians but everyone in this fuckin world that was pollute by the Americans.
CANADIANS are only the spokespeople to tell u the reality: NOBODY LIKES U!!
so stop saying thing without sens JUSTE...go to hell |
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