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A Few Manly Jokes
Posted by: Dumbass on June 23, 2005 @ 8:55 pm
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog of course...at least he’ll shut up after you let him in.
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, "What’s on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!".
In the beginning, God created earth and rested.
Then God created man and rested.
Then God created woman.
Since then, neither God nor man has rested.
Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful.
One day a man living in California found a genie. The genie says to him, "I’m not going to grant you 3 wishes, this time you only get one." The man says, "Alright, one is better than nothing." The man thinks long and hard and finally says, "I’m afraid of flying and I really want to move to Hawaii, so I wish you would build me a bridge to Hawaii." The genie is flabbergasted. He says, "Do you realize how long that is? And how deep the Pacific is? That would take more concrete than there is in New York to build. That’s ridiculous, think of a new wish." The man thinks long and hard again. He says, "Well, I just broke up with my girlfriend because she said I wasn’t sensitive enough and that I didn’t understand women. I wish to understand women so I can get back together with her." The genie replies, "would you like that bridge two lanes or four?".
A man was listening to the radio when he heard that there was a car going the wrong way on Interstate 7, he knew his wife was driving on it at the time. He frantically called her on his cell phone and hysterically yelled, "Honey, watch out! There is a car going the wrong way on the Interstate 7!" His wife replied, "There isn’t just one car! There are hundreds of them!".
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Add your own comment
| From: |
laltmeyer on October 3, 2005 @ 4:44 pm |
| Comment: |
how about you replace all the she her and womas with he him and men then it would be funny because then it would be true |
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